Apologies in advance...

... to whoever is going to send me an email some time in the future that I have apparently already deleted? That's obviously why I have negative one emails right now. I deleted one I haven't even gotten yet.

Total protonic reversal.

     Or maybe I shouldn't apologize because apparently the content of this future email is so incredibly dangerous that I either invented time travel myself in order to come back in time and delete it before I could read it and alter the timeline in some personally devastating fashion, or the Men in Black got word of it and came in and screwed around with my emails to prevent catastrophic and universal devastation. Which is pretty impressive because most of my emails are just Groupon offers and sale alerts from the Gap. Maybe I was going to buy a really, really tragic pair of pants? Like boyfriend jeans, maybe? And future me was like "girlfriend who are you kidding, no." I don't know. I guess I'll never know.