Quick Fixes: T-shirt Envy

     Here's a scenario I find myself in frequently: you see a t-shirt somewhere online and think "Oooh, I want that!" then you either a) can't find it again later or b) track down where it comes from and find out it doesn't come in the size/color/material/exact font that you want. What do you do? Make your own! 

     This time around I kept seeing variations of the same idea: some shirt (long sleeve, short sleeve, white, pink, blue, what have you) with the phrase "ex-mermaid" on it in any number of fonts. This pleased me. I frequently joke that I used to be a mermaid, since that would explain the truly stupid amount of hair I have as well as my insane water consumption needs (I wake up like Spongebob in Sandy's treedome. waaaater. waaaater. Also one time in Target I picked up a bottle of water at the checkout, but the line was somewhat longish and by the time I got to the cashier I had to buy a second bottle because I'd already drank the first one. The struggle is real). And my uncanny ability to lure sailors to their deaths and collect their souls, I guess (I would not be a sweet mermaid). Anyway, I decided I'd just whip myself up a version of that theme.

     For the stencil, I downloaded a free font I liked, typed it up, then printed it and asked my mom to trace/cut it out of stencil material because I can't be trusted to not cut a finger off with an x-acto knife (I'm too shaky; like a chihuahua but more rattled). Then I just taped the corners down...

This neon paint and nail polish color actually make me look tan. What a fantastic illusion. 

     And stippled the paint straight up and down over the stencil. If you go at an angle at all you can end up getting paint under the stencil, so it's important to hold the stencil tight and your pouncer thingy straight. Then let the paint dry a bit, pull off the stencil and...

     Voila! The dark splotch up there is because I tried to ruin everything by getting a smidge of paint off the edge of the stencil. I caught it pretty quickly though, so it came out with a wet paper towel no problem. I think I'm going to roll the sleeves on the shirt (it's just a plain pale pink short sleeved oversized tee I picked up at a craft store out of a sale section. It doesn't look very pink here, but as we've seen, the neon plays tricks) and tack them so they stay up, then it'll be ready to wear!

Quick Fixes: Annie get your glue-gun.

     You know how sometimes you'll just be going about your day when you notice something...off? Just a tiny little thing that isn't quite right about your house or your life or whatever, and you think, "Oh well, it's not that big of a deal," but then you can't get it out of your head and suddenly it's been like a month and you've been slowly simmering up a nice rage stew that's about to boil over because OKAY SERIOUSLY LET'S JUST FIX THE DAMN THING. You know that feeling, right? Well, this bedskirt was one of those things for me.

     Do you see it? Do you see what was worming it's way through my brain, slowly driving me to madness? It's one of those bedskirts that just has elastic at the top, so you can wrap it around your boxspring instead of putting it between the boxspring and the mattress. Which is a cool idea and all, but my bed has a little tray thing with slats across, so I can't use it that way. So I thought it would work just fine if I wrapped it around the wooden frame on the long side of the bed, then tucked it inside at the foot of the bed, so it hangs inside the frame, unimpeded by slats. Genius! Except not! Because that meant it slipped all over the place and was never hanging right. So I added some velcro dots to the skirt and the frame, and they worked for about a minute before the adhesive on the velcro dots gave out. SOOOO I took the hot glue gun to it and attached them more...permanently (MUAHAHAHA. I dunno. Felt right). Now they hold the bedskirt in place and at the right height and all that good jazzy stuff. But then. BUT THEN.

     The corners. The corners didn't lay right because they're switching from outside the frame to inside on one continuous piece of fabric, if that makes sense (does it? It can be so hard to step outside my own brain sometimes). SOSOSO. The solution here was just a simple slit at the corners to allow the bedskirt to switch over from outside to inside the frame more... seamlessly. And if you're wondering why I set that up like it was a pun, it's because it's totally a pun. I didn't do any seams. (Ba dum tssss). Instead I took the glue gun to it again, just folding a tiny bit over on each cut edge and gluing in a little hem to keep them from fraying/avoid ugly raw edges.

     Are you ready to see the infinitesimally small difference that had a huge impact on my sanity? Ok, here we go. Ta-daaaa.

     I feel like this really shouldn't be so gratifying to me, because normal people probably wouldn't even notice it (I mean, I'm guessing. I don't actually know any normal people, I don't think), but like I said. It was one of those THINGS.

Quick and Easy Maxi-skirt!

     This little project was born of necessity. Basically I was wearing the two other maxi skirts I own every day (well, every day it was warm enough) and realized I could use a more neutral one so I would never have to wear pants ever ever again so long as I shall live (until fall). So I picked up that gold polka-dotted stretchy number you saw in that preview post, and a bit of elastic here and some stitching there, then I had a skirt! Ok, it was a little more than that. But not really. Basically here's what happened.

     Only one seam, since I wanted it to be gathered anyway (so you wouldn't see it) and "there's no point cutting it just to sew it back together" as a front and back panel, as my mom said. So wise. Elastic at the top, sewn on with the elastic streeeetched out, so it gathers when in its natural position, with one row of zig-zag stitches to hold it to the back of the fabric, folded over, and another row of stitches to hide it. Hem at the bottom -- honesty time, I haven't done it yet, which is why in the "finished" picture I'm about to show you I'm on my tippy toppy toes -- and that's about it. 

     So now I just need to hem this bad boy, then I shall commence wearing it every day until people start to make fun of me for it, at which point I will... continue to wear it but know in my heart of hearts that those people kind of suck a little bit. 

Quick Fixes: SHELF Life. Does this pun even make sense?

     The space behind my glider has been needing something to spice it up for a while. I thought putting something there would anchor the chair and make it seem less like it was floating out in the middle of the room (it has to be pretty far away from the wall because those Viking spear things on top hit the wall if it's too close). So I figured, "why not a shelf?" That way I could do something functional with that space and add plants! I love house plants. 

     I picked up this shelf for twenty bucks at Target -- honestly, I could have found a cheaper shelf if I wanted to, but this one was there in front of me and I like to think of a thing then have it in front of me the same day, so I just got it. It worked out well because this shelf happens to match the footboard of my bed really well. Yeah, the one I walk into all the time. Hopefully I won't injure myself on this shelf. It would be hard, since it's behind a chair, but who knows. I do excel at hurting myself in stupid ways. 

     Then I got these two cute plants to go on top and make it all spring-y and delightful. The first little guy I picked up because hey, it's cute and it was only 2.50. The other, I don't even know how much it cost. I just saw it and went "YES, YOU ARE COMING HOME WITH ME" because look at it, it's so cool! It looks like green tortellinis! I named him Mr. Tortelton. Obviously. 

     Then I happened upon those two little clear star-shaped candle holders in the top picture at Goodwill for ridiculously cheap (I think about 2.50 for both?). I dunno why, since I don't even have any candles to put in them (yet), but they spoke to me. So I brought them home to live on the shelf too! 

     I think it was a really good way to make that weird little space seem more intentional, and it brought Mr. Tortelton into my life, so I'm pleased as punch! 

Quick Fixes: Bedding Swap!

     I don't know what's come over me, but I'm definitely in a mood for quick fixes these days (spoiler alert: Monday's post is another one). It's like that need for instant gratification my generation is so known for finally caught up to me. 

     Today's quick fix is probably the number one easiest way to update a room and give it a new feel without having to actually...you know, work or anything. Switching out the bedding! I decided I wanted new sheets because my bamboo sheets, though super soft, were looking really grody and worn through, and the cream color looked especially off-putting against the white of practically everything else in my room. I also decided I wanted a new comforter, because I do this thing every once in a while where I convince myself I am a quilt person, and I do want to be, because quilts are lovely and have a lot of personality, but when you get right down to it I'm a comforter person. I always end up missing the plushness of a comforter. I find it...comforting. Go figure. And as someone who has the shaky, easily rattled disposition of a chihuahua, I need all the comforting I can get. But enough chit-chat! Let's look at pictures! 

Oooh, somebody got her grubby little paws on the Orton filter to make it look extra dreamy...

     The comforter set was actually a pretty easy choice, because I'd just convinced Jen to get this style, so I knew exactly where to find one. I guess I thought it was a really really great idea, so I copped it for myself too. I got it at Stein-Mart for a cool sixty bucks, which I thought was pretty reasonable since it's queen sized and came with two shams and a bedskirt (that I did not use because it was kind of tragic-looking, but still, it counts for something). 

     Then I picked out these navy blue and white polka-dotted sheets. I went with that pattern partly because I wanted to bring back some of the blue that I used to have in my room, which kind of got phased out a bit over time as I added more white and pink, and partly because there weren't too many options that would have matched and I figured "hey, I've never said no to navy and white polka dots before, why start now?" They're microfiber, so they're reeeeeeeeeally soft, and they were only twenty dollars. Since they were so cheap they do have that annoying thing on the fitted sheet where there's only elastic at each corner, not all the way around, but for the price I won't complain too much. 

     So my cloud-bed grows ever more literal in its design. I'm pleased with how fluffy and light it is, and it does brighten the room a good deal in comparison to my old quilt, which had gray and yellow in the design that kind of made it look like it was always dirty, even though it wasn't. The only weird thing is that since the air in the house is so dry the comforter makes a truly RIDICULOUS amount of static. I can run my hands along it at night and it lights up like it has actual bulbs in it. Naturally this means that the first night I slept under it I spent half an hour frantically googling "very staticky blanket fire hazard spontaneous combustion," but apparently it'll be fine once it's not so dry and I'm only at risk for spontaneous combustion if I'm an extremely heavy drinker or live in coal-mining country and go to bed covered in coal dust. So unfortunately my dreams of being a coal-miner are now out of reach, but other than that, yes, pleased as punch! 


     

Quick Fixes: Looket this locket!

     So I was browsin' the craft store the other day, helping Amanda pick out ingredients to make a necklace for an '80s party, when these little thingies caught my eye.

They were also on sale for 50% off, so if you were thinking that $8.99 is surprisingly pricey for a cheap-ass like me, you were right! 

     Actually I first saw the little filler doodads on the left there and did a "gasp OOOOOOOOOH" because that is everything I love in my jewels contained in one tiny package: moons, stars, mixed metals, sparkles (they had a TON of different sets too: beach theme, sports, and so on). Then I spent a good three minutes trying to find the other component, the thing you actually put the baublies in. I finally found them at the veeery top of the display. They had this plainer version and one that had rhinestones around the outside, like in the picture on the packaging on the left, but I thought that was too flashy for me. 

     So I got them home and put them together (it just snaps open with a strong magnetic closure, like a locket), and IT'S REALLY PRETTY. Sorry for getting all capsy, but I really like how it's got a thrown-together vibe, like "Oh I was just finishing up some spells I was casting this morning and tossed some talismans and charms in here to take with me," because you know one of my favorite aesthetics is "weird cat-lady who the neighbor kids are pretty sure is a witch," aka the aunts from Practical Magic. 

     I'm going to put it on a long silver chain to wear, but I can't decide if I should leave it as is or age the silver locket part a bit. It might feel a little too shiny and new for me right now. I was thinking of scuffing it up a bit with some sandpaper and rubbing a little dark paint in the scratches to make it look old, like someone recently dug it up in the forest (I have weird fashion aspirations, don't I?). Or possibly putting some tiny bits of gold or copper leaf on it in a few places to bring in more of that mixed metal look I love so much? I'm not sure how that would hold up, anyway. I just don't know! I'll have to think on it. 

Quick Fixes: Alternate Ending Edition?

     One of the perils of working from home is that it's hard to designate a work space, so if you're anything like me you end up working in bed all day. Supposedly that's bad because then your brain associates climbing into bed with working instead of sleeping, so it's harder to sleep at night or whatever (the human brain is an amazing piece of machinery. And also really stupid). Plus I feel like if you sit on memory foam all day your ass'll turn to straight-up mush. I can't work at my desk because the chair is really uncomfortable and the height of it would make my head snap off my neck after a few hours of working (I hunch. I hunch bad). So I've been trying to get into the habit of using my super-comfy glider and a lap desk. That way it's comfy, I don't slouch over what I'm doing, and I can set everything aside to get up and walk around every now and again (so my butt doesn't turn to Play-Doh. The concern is real). The only problem? After staring at that lap desk for hours every day I started to resent it for its ugliness. I don't know why; it's not like it had, like, a repeating print of the poop emoji all over it. I just got really tired of looking at its fake wood-grain top. I make no claims that this is rational. It is but my truth. 

Ugh, look at it. It's like...smug. 

       My weird projections about the bad attitude of a slab of compressed sawdust aside, it also had some nail polish and ink stains on it that weren't exactly gorgeous. So a plan was hatched! First let's see how it turned out. 

Ta-daaaaa! If this picture looks hastily taken, it's because my camera kept saying "battery exhausted" and turning off before I could take an after picture and I was like "okwhateverfine camera, WE'RE ALL EXHAUSTED BUT WE STILL DO OUR JOBS." 

     So to get to this I took a roll of wrapping paper, cut a manageable approximation of the right size, then hit the lap desk with some spray glue and carefully rolled the paper across it, trying to keep it from getting any bubbles underneath. Then when it was all smooth I flipped it over and traced around it with an x-acto knife and did two coats of clear lacquer to seal it, so if I spill Diet Coke on it or something it'll wipe right off.

THAT'S HOW IT COULD HAVE HAPPENED.

     Now if I made that seem like it was all sunshine and daisies and the magical crafting gods smiled down upon me and said "let thine endeavors go smoothly on this day," that is because I am a tricksty hobbits who trickstily arranged her blog post to make her look like less of a failure. But then thought "whatever, everyone already knows I'm a failure" and decided to include the rest of the story too. 

     What actually happened was that when I bought the wrapping paper I thought "Oh I'll just mod-podge this onto the top and it'll be all glossy and decoupaged and cool!" And so I did a nice thin even layer of mod-podge, then carefully rolled my paper across, squeegeeing out any air bubbles as I went...only to have it turn wrinklier than the littlest piggy at the market after a long bath when it dried. At this point I stared at it, seething and remembering the last time I used mod-podge, which also ended with me saying "Why do people even use this? It suuuuucks!" Seriously, I am hard-pressed to remember a mod-podge project that didn't end in total unmitigated disaster. So it looked like crap, and it was too late to just pull it off and try again, so I spent twenty minutes scraping it off with a...spackler? What is this thing even called?

     So that was fun. And by fun I mean I sandpapered off my fingerprints trying to get the last bits off. 

     But all's well that ends well, and it looks nice now. And I learned an important lesson: Never to try a mod-podge project again as long as I live. Yay, learning! 

Quick Fix: Stealing some Spring...

     Like most people, I've had just about enough cold weather for this year, thankyouverymuch, so whilst strolling through the store the other day, a little glimpse of things to come caught my eye: bulbs! Like, plant bulbs, not light bulbs. We all know I don't have the best track record with those. So I picked up a box of what is supposed to turn into this...

     ... but which for now looks like this...

     Sad trombone sound. I gussied it up as much as I could with lace and ribbon, but there's no getting around the fact that right now it's just a jar of dirt. A fancily dressed jar of dirt, but a jar of dirt nonetheless. But let's pretend it's a grand metaphor for my blossoming hopes and dreams and the slow but sure return of warmer weather or something, ok? Ok. Cool. Glad we got that sorted. 

     Anyway, I know it's kind of a stretch to call this a quick fix, but it will be pretty quick in the grand scheme of things, because bulbs can grow pretty fast indoors. I'll let you know when I start seeing progress! Or if it turns out to be a dud, but I'm hoping that's not the case. 

Just a friendly reminder...

     ...that gluing stuff to bobby pins and hair clips is really easy and super fun and you get new stuff for free! I've been on a bit of a spree lately. I dunno what it is that makes me want to take random things and stick them in my hair for decoration. Some sort of bizarre birdlike instinct to augment my nest of hair before spring comes? Who knows. The heart wants what the heart wants, etc. Anyway, here are some of the things I've turned into hair bedazzlements recently.

     The first idea I had was to make a pretty little velvet bow from some pink ribbon I've had sitting around since before Christmas. I want to wear it on top of my head like Marie, the cat from The Aristocats. Except like...human. Like this picture that I pinned on Pinterest.

     Then I figured I'd go digging through my stash of bits and bobs while the glue gun was still hot and see what else I could come up with. I've had the red sequined Hello Kitty-style bow for ages and I had always intended to make it into a hair pin so I could run around being stupidly adorable like a Japanese cat -- follow your dreams, kids! I picked it up on clearance at a craft store and forgot about it until now! The seagull, that big round gold thing (please read with upward inflection to denote my complete lack of a clue as to what that ever was), and the floral doodad were all floating around in a jar of miscellaneous potential craft supplies that I keep. You'll notice that for most of these, a single bobby pin hot-glued to the back was enough to hold everything together (the pink bow has one tucked into the middle piece of the bow on the back with a dot of glue for hold). For the big floral...thing, though, I decided to use several pins in more of a decorative hair-comb formation, since it's heavier and could use more support. I could have just glued it to an actual hair comb, but I didn't have one on hand and I'm far too impatient to wait until I can go out and get one. So this works! That one might be my favorite, because it actually started out looking all sad and rhinestone-less because they had all fallen out years ago. I'm not sure where it came from, but I think it might have been in a bag of broken jewelry that my mom bought for super cheap on impulse at an antique store. Which makes me even happier to bring it back to a state of functionality!

Oooh, look at this completely unnecessary skill I learned this weekend!

     Bonus points: not only is it totally unnecessary, it's hysterically time-consuming! Like, twenty minute chunks of my life, ske-plosh, down the drain. Don't get me wrong, the end results are super pretty and impressive. It's just that in hindsight I realize there are probably more exciting ways I could have spent my Friday afternoon. Oh well, now I can whip this out at parties to impress people with my papercraft wizardry. Check it! I present to you: wrapping paper sea-urchin-type pointy spike bows!

     They're so, so pretty in person. Way more of a statement than any old squashed little bow you dug out of your attic five minutes before the party. I used this tutorial here, so I won't go into detail on how I made them, since that blog does a really good job of explaining it. The only thing I did differently was use hot glue instead of Elmer's, because I do not have the patience to hold eight hundred little cones of paper together while they dry. Once I'd gotten the hang of it and switched to hot glue, they took about twenty minutes each from start to finish. So I wouldn't recommend planning your whole wrapping scheme around one of these on every present (unless you're just feeling like a few hours of something crazy tedious would mellow you out -- no judgment, you do you), but if you need a real show-stopper for one present, then yeah, definitely give it a shot. They're not hard to assemble once you get into a groove. So hey, why not? 

It's beginning to look a ... little...like Christmas?

     I started the Christmasification of my room yesterday! I started out light with a couple of little changes here and there (mostly because I don't have many decorations that match yet -- I want to hit up the pink candy-themed Christmas section at Hobby Lobby), but it's enough to get my holiday spirit going. Have a look at some of the changes I made!

     First up, I swapped the roses above my windows for some silver, white, and blue tinsel, plus some blue string lights ($2.50 at Target!).

     The blue lights are really pretty in the dark, too. 

     Then on the other side of the room, I added a mini Christmas tree! I've had my eye on this little white tree with iridescent pink bits for a while, and it was the last one on the shelves at Target today, so I figured I'd go ahead and get it before it was gone. 

 

     I also stuck a sprig of wintry-looking berries (?) in the vase on the left and wrapped some extra tinsel around the bottom of the storage box there, just cause. The pink unicorn isn't actually holiday-specific, I'm just really into unicorns, and it kinda makes sense there. 

     The last little change I made was to wrap some silver garland around my wall mirror and stick a few bows on the corner, just so I'd have a little extra holiday-ness right before I go out the door. 

     I dunno what that face is, don't even ask. 

     Anyway, so that's what I've been up to, but I'm just gearing up in my quest to make everything cheerful and cozy! 

(Insert your favorite pun based on the word "dye" here)

     Yesterday was an exciting benchmark -- my first foray into dyeing clothes! I had never dyed anything before (aside from tie-dye projects, obviously. Wait, is that obvious?), mostly because I had this conception that it was a big hassle and super messy. But I finally had the kick in the pants I needed to try it out, in the form of this hand-me-down shirt. 

     Amanda was cleaning out her closet the other day and asked me if I wanted this shirt to sleep in or something. The caveat of "to sleep in or something" is because of that stain on the left sleeve; apparently she got chocolate on it, didn't notice, washed and dried it, then noticed it, and....left it sitting in her closet for five months. So that's a pretty damn set-in stain. It was not coming out. And sure, I could have just worn it as a PJ top, but it's one of the nice soft, drapey, comfy shirts from Victoria's Secret that I'm too cheap to buy myself. I wanted to make the most of this freebie! So I decided to try dyeing it a dark color to hide the stain and thus squeeze some extra wearability out of it. I figured it was at least worth a shot, since even if I ruined it completely somehow, hey, it was still a free shirt to begin with. 

     I picked this dark purple dye because I figured it would camouflage the stain but still be pretty. Obviously to hide a chocolate stain, brown or black would be the easiest options, but I didn't want to go brown because brown is a disgusting color (sorry I'm not sorry), and black would have looked fine, but since I mainly wear dark-washed jeans or leggings, dyeing the shirt black would pretty much rule out wearing it anywhere other than funerals with very casual dress codes. So, purple it is. I followed the directions on the back of the packet almost to the letter, except that it said to stir the fabric item in the dye/hot water/salt mixture constantly for fifteen minutes, and I felt like surely they had just put that on there to screw with people. Fifteen minutes is a long time to stand around stirring a tub of clothes and murky water like Charlie Bucket's mom. I stirred for maybe three minutes before I got bored and quit. 

I mean, I stirred it a little better than this. 

     Then after it had stewed for the appropriate amount of time, I rinsed-rinsed-rinsed it in the sink before chucking it in the washer on cold with some similarly colored items. Yeah, I did a purple load. How's that for separating your laundry? I didn't put it in the dryer because the packet said to avoid exposing the dyed item to heat or sunlight. So to avoid heat, I figured best not put it in the dryer or wear it when snuggled up in my heated blanket, and to avoid sunlight, I'll just continue my usual cave-dweller lifestyle. Once it had air-dried...ta-da!

     You can still see the stain if you're looking, but it's at a level of unnoticeableness (pretend that's a word) that I'm comfortable with. Only the truly detail-oriented will notice when I'm wearing it (especially because it's on the back of the sleeve, where I'd have to be raising my hand or something, which I rarely do because I'm a rebel and I'll talk out of turn if I want to, dammit. YOLO and such).  I think it's kind of cool how the embroidered Victoria's Secret dog at the bottom didn't take any dye since it's synthetic thread and synthetic fibers are less porous than natural fibers because they're spun from polymers that make it smooth and blah blah blah, science. I am glad that none of the other threads are visible though, because I don't think I'd like a purple shirt with neon green seams. Too much muchness. The other side-effect is that all that stirring around with a stick, combined with no heat from the dryer, means this shirt streeeetched out quite a bit. I'm actually totally cool with that, because it just makes it slouchy and cocoon-esque and generally a delight to wear, but if you're thinking about dyeing something yourself, take that into account. 

     Overall I am happy to report that my first foray into at-home clothes dyeing is a success! I like when that happens. 

Wait, don't freak out.

     That's how I prefaced my entrance into any room yesterday. See, I had decided it would be fun to do a faux bob for the day. Just for a change of pace; I'm not thinking about cutting it or anything. I just like to play around with different options. But it may have been a little too realistic -- several people greeted me with a panicked look on their faces. 

     Honestly, this one is like difficulty level: witchcraft. But I'll sit here and make it sound all simple, just to annoy everybody. First I sectioned my hair off into a top section and a section underneath, clipping the top section out of the way. Then I curled pieces of random sizes, and after each piece, I'd coil it up like a pin curl, but starting about halfway up my hair, leaving the bottom half out. A couple of bobby pins crossed over one another held the curl in place, and I continued the process around the rest of the bottom layer. Once it was all pinned up, I let down the top half and curled and pinned it the same way; the only difference is that I pulled a few of the front pieces on each side back before pinning them to cover the curls of the bottom layer. I didn't really worry about covering the pins in the back, just kind of pinned one piece so that it covered another, so on and so on, until you couldn't really see them (to my knowledge. What do I care, it's the back of my head. I don't have to look at it). I threw on a clip just for kicks and giggles and called it a day.

     It was pretty fun for a day, and I do so enjoy leaving panic in my wake everywhere I go. I know I've been talking about hair a lot lately, but I promise this isn't turning into a hair blog (although I do have one more hair post coming up -- but after that, I'll cool it for a while, I promise. Wait, no I don't. No promises. Hair is fun). I just really enjoy messing around with my appearance so that I never look the same from one day to the next. It just tickles me. Being pretty much unrecognizable from one day to the next: it's kind of my superpower. 

Winter is Coming.

     No, not in the figurative "go House Stark" sense, like, literally. So I spent some time this weekend getting my room ready for colder weather with a few simple changes. 

1. Blankets. All the blankets. 

     Useful for extra layers at night, for bundling up in when you want to walk around like a human burrito, or for fort-building supplies. I think the key to making a room seem warm and inviting in winter is to layer, layer, layer. Ever wonder what it is about those Pottery Barn/West Elm type rooms that makes them seem so cozy? It's the thousands of dollars worth of textiles. I love that look, but I get hives spending more than thirty dollars at a time, so I use a fluffy pink duvet cover (I stuff a down comforter in if it gets really freezy) that I got from one of those discount stores like TJ Maxx, Marshalls, or Ross (I forget which one), a Shabby Chic quilt from Target, a soft white quilted blanket, also from Target, and a pink and white lap afghan that someone in my family hand-made at some point to achieve my desired level of fluffy warmness. 

2. Flannel sheets. 

     I was worried that I'd overheat in flannel sheets, since I have a tendency to reach near combustible temperatures at night, but I'm actually really enjoying them. They just multiply the existing snuggly factor. These also happen to match my quilt perfectly, so that's a bonus.

3. Thicker curtains. 

     I love my polka dot sheers, but when it comes to insulating from the frostiness outside, they're pretty useless. In winter I like to switch mine out for these heavy cotton panels from Target. They're not the fancy thermal kind or anything, but they definitely help. Aside from the obvious reason -- blocking any drafts that may sneak in from the windows and acting as a little bit of extra insulation to keep the cold out and the heat in -- they also help to visually bring the room in a little, as opposed to sheer white, which makes the room seem bigger. I know people almost always want to make spaces seem bigger, but in winter I like my room to feel a little more close and homey. But that's just personal preference! If you have a small space or just like to keep things very open-feeling, you could always just use heavier curtains in a lighter color. I also can't say enough good things about thermal curtains for older buildings. The apartment I lived in while I was at school in Richmond was built in 1921, and the windows were rubbish at keeping the cold out. The insulated curtains that I kept closed at night to stop the noticeable breeze that came in even when the windows were shut tight were a lifesaver. 

4. A cozy candle. 

     Subtlety is for squares, so I went with the aptly named "Winter" candle from Bath and Body Works, which smells like firewood and pine needles and a tiny bit of cinnamon. The reason I like this one so much at this time in the season is because it's definitely appropriate for the colder weather, but not Christmas-y. A lot of winter-themed candles skew way too pepperminty for the beginning of the cold season (though you best believe once Thanksgiving is gone I'll be pepperminting everything I can get my hands on. I'm so stoked for Christmas). 

     So there you have it! Just a few little changes to make the changing seasons seem a little less forboding and a little more relaxing.  

Night night, sleep tight.

     I'd been wanting to make myself a sleep mask for a while now, for a totally First World Problems-esque reason: I like to fall asleep with the tv on, because listening to it keeps my mind just occupied enough to stave off my nighttime anxiety/racing thoughts, but not so occupied that I can't fall asleep. That's not the first world problem, though. It's that my tv is kind of too big and bright. Yeah, I'm sorry that I even made you read me saying that, because I realize what a jerk it makes me sound like. But it's true! It's a great tv for daytime, but when I'm trying to fall asleep, those bright white commercials can be a little jarring (somebody call the Waaaah-mbulance). So I decided I'd whip up a quick little eye mask to wear at night. Well, it would have been a quick project, were I not completely and utterly incompetent. But we'll get to that. First, let me get to the point and show you what I made. 

     As you can see, it's pretty simple. It's assembled from these pieces...

     I would have taken pictures of the assembly process, but as I mentioned, it was kind of a shit-show for me, so the documentation part slipped my mind. Basically I just cut out two pieces of a soft stretchy-ish fabric based on a template I made of paper, then cut out two layers of batting in the same shape, but smaller so they'd fit inside. For the straps, I made my life way more difficult than it had to be by making them out of fabric, sewing a long rectangle into a tube and turning it (the unfinished edge ended up inside the seam of the mask, so I didn't have to worry about that). In hindsight, I wish I'd just used ribbon. To assemble, I put the two pieces of the mask right sides together and sewed around everywhere except the sides, where I wanted the straps to attach inside. Then I turned it right side out, shoved the batting inside, lined up the straps, and sewed them in, closing the open spaces on the mask at the same time. To make the mask stay on and actually, you know, function, I sewed a bit of elastic at the back (you can see it in the top photo if you look closely; it's right underneath where the two straps overlap at the back). Finally, for the cheeky eyelashes and winged liner, I used some scrap lace and ribbon, attached with hot glue. 

     Did I make that sound simple? It really should have been. But nooo, I had to make it involve literal tears and blood. See, originally I was going to make the whole mask out of that blue fabric the straps are made from, but it turns out that fabric is a complete and utter bitch to sew on. It kept shredding and turning into this fine blue fuzzy dust in my hands. Absolute misery. Eventually my frustration got the better of me, and I decided to switch gears. The animal print fabric I chose instead was somewhat easier to work with, but since it's stretchy, it still gave me a few issues. I also somehow managed to gravely wound myself with a pin when placing the straps, which necessitated a ten minute break to hold a paper towel on my finger (I considered adding a picture of the bloodied paper towel for drama, but decided that was probably too gross and vaguely serial-killer-y). How do you hurt yourself so badly with a straight-pin that it bleeds for ten minutes? Hell if I know. Blind luck, I guess. So that's where the blood came in.  

     After that I figured I was in for a massively traumatic hot glue gun burn or something, but surprisingly I managed to traverse that minefield safely. Where it really all went to hell was when I was about two minutes from being done, as I was sewing in the elastic piece at the back. Remember those nice straps that I went to all the trouble of making out of that God-forsaken blue fabric composed of a heretofore unknown form of matter that is apparently only a solid mass until I touch it? Just after I finished sewing the first side of the elastic, I went to cut the thread using the little blade tucked away on the back side of my sewing machine. But somehow I managed to get the strap caught in the (seriously, freaking microscopic) blade instead, and in that one quick motion I'm used to doing to cut the thread, I SLICED RIGHT INTO MY BEAUTIFUL OVERLY COMPLICATED STRAPS LIKE GODDAMN SWEENEY TODD. It was at this point that I completely lost it. 

     I couldn't decide if I wanted to laugh or cry, so I kind of did both? It was that fifty-fifty split of sobbing and hysterical laughter that's generally reserved for disturbed lighthouse keepers. I'm sure it was frightening to behold. Especially because I did it while sitting in the middle of this mess:

     Not exactly the kind of beautiful, clean, organized, naturally-lit workspace all the other DIY bloggers have, but I'm pretty sure they're just photoshopping out all the candy wrappers and fabric schnibbles and bloodied tissue scraps. At least that's what I'm going to tell myself. 

     Anyway, after taking a tiny project and somehow turning it into a massive ordeal, I'm gonna go take that sleep mask for a spin and hope my next project goes more smoothly! 

Spooky Sticks

     I figure I should really be cramming in any last minute Halloween ideas now since it's rapidly approaching, so today let's talk about another quick, easy, and cheap decoration that you can whip up, once again using my favorite free resource: sticks! The inspiration for this was found at Target, where they had a similar set-up going for $25 dollars a pot. That's fifty bucks to bookend your front door with some creepy looking sticks. No thanks. Here's what you do if you're feeling like not paying for fancy landscape refuse:

1. Collect some nice branches. 

2. Spray paint them black. 

3. Add glitter if desired.

4. Place in a black pot at desired angle of stand-up-ness.

5. Spray foam the shit outta it. 

6. Cover that however you so desire. You can paint it black for a swamp witch look...

... or slap some moss in there for a slightly less oil-spill-ish appearance (although really, what's scarier than environmental disasters?).

     

     Pretty Halloween-appropriate, yeah? It probably adds to the scary factor that I've been sitting on my bed by the window, zonked out on cold medicine and rocking a sickly cast that really takes my natural paleness into full on restless spirit territory, so I'm sure anyone driving by has been thoroughly spooked. 

Halloween-ing the house!

     Halloween is rapidly approaching, and around here we're spookifying the house in preparation. Here's a quick, easy, and cheap way to bring a little creepiness into the home (I say this as a total hypocrite -- I can practically hear Morticia Addams saying "...but Debbie....pastels?" every time I walk into my room. Oh well. Split personalities for the win!). 

Step 1: Raid the woods. 

     Take a walk through your local foliage and collect some nice twisty twigs. Try your best to keep them away from your giant dog who is comically obsessed with sticks. 

As a side note, this picture reminded me of a children's book my mom used to read to me that had ragdoll children and they had to go through a thicket at some point and it wasn't supposed to be scary but I always found it tremendously upsetting for some reason (I still get anxious thinking about it) and now I can't remember what it's called and I can't find it on Google and I've been looking for over an hour and I'm worried it may just be a manifestation of my anxiety that I invented as a child and it's not a real book at all and I'M FEELING VERY AGITATED is what I'm getting at.

Step 2: Paint it black. Then add glitter.

     Throw down some newspaper or a dropcloth or what have you and hit the sticks with some black spray paint. Then, while the paint is still wet, sprinkle some glitter on top. 

I wish I'd seen that smudge on the lens earlier. Let's just pretend it's a ghost, in the spirit of Halloween. Oooh, a lost soul who wants me to have poor quality photos -- scaaary.

Step 3: Arrange fittingly. 

     These particular sticks were destined to become a nest for this fine fellow here.

    
     And of course I couldn't resist a spookified version:

     And done! Easy peasy, lemon squeezy. The best part about this little Halloweenification is that you don't have to worry about storing this from year to year. It takes a tiny smidgen of spray paint and glitter that you probably already have, and sticks. You can't get much cheaper than free, so go ahead and toss them when the season of creeping is over.

Ch-ch-changes!

     Ok, now that the obligatory Bowie reference is out of the way, let's get on with the post. Fall is the season of change, and thus, appropriately, I've been making a few little changes here and there lately. Let's take a look-see. 

1. I did this to my laptop.

Should maybe have added a warning to grab a bowl for when your eyeballs pop out.

      I dunno why. Cause I'm a grown-up now and I can put stickers on WHATEVER I WANT, I guess. I was just randomly struck with the urge to make my laptop look like it belonged to a third grader, so I covered it in ponies and Batman and sharks and Hello Kitty and cupcakes. Such is my life. I'll be mature in the ways I have to be (like being punctual and honest and responsible and shit) but you can pry my stickers and cartoons and sugary cereals from my cold, dead, sticky-from-recently-eating-candy hands. But this explosion of chid-like glee isn't the only thing I did to my laptop...

     (On a side note, if you're wondering why my reading lamp is turned upside down like that, it's because when I turned it on the other day the light bulb went out, and when I tried to change the light bulb, it turned to shards and dust-clouds in my hand, resulting in a big debacle in which I was pretty sure I was gonna die from accidentally breathing the powdery stuff they put inside light bulbs, and the coroner would be sure I was some delinquent trying to huff light bulb guts, and my family would live in shame forever. After that massive freak-out I kind of didn't feel like dealing with getting the remnants of the bulb out of the lamp, so for now it's just a decorative vase of glass shards hanging above my bed. Stylish.)

2. I replaced the keyboard. 

     This isn't exactly an exciting accomplishment, but I was pretty pleased with myself for getting it done without somehow mutilating the computer beyond repair and having to blow my savings on a whole new computer. Why did i have to replace the keyboard, you ask? WELL. That's because my mom threw a pattern envelope to me for my perusal, but I wasn't paying attention, so I didn't catch it. Instead it went skittering across my keyboard, popping off and breaking (as in, it was not a matter of just popping them back on) a few of the keys in the process. If that sounds implausible, that's because you must not know that apparently my mother has been a secret ninja, practiced in the art of the throwing star, all this time. Yeah, I was surprised too. You can order replacement keys, as well as the little plastic mechanisms that hold them on and make them function, but with the cost of the keys themselves plus the shipping cost (not to mention the wait-time that comes with standard shipping -- I can only go for so long without parentheses keys, you know? Yeah, you know), it ended up making more sense to just buy a replacement keyboard from Amazon with two-day Prime shipping so it'd be cheap and get here quickly. After watching a Youtube video showing how to change the keyboard on a laptop similar to my own, it was a pretty simple operation. Aaah, nothing like a new keyboard, keys all present and functional, all clicky and new, with no food crumbs stuck in the crevices (I'm the worst).

     I also have a pink keyboard skin coming to a) prevent any more freak accidents like that from happening again, b) help keep the new keyboard clean and dust/crumb free, and c) to really take the pink-cuteness factor from the stickers on the front and just amp it up to 11. Whose laptop is this, Katy Perry's? Nope, it's mine. 

3. I dyed my hair again. 

Oh look, it's super blown-out on a white background; it's like Terry Richardson takes my blog photos. Just kidding, I just get overzealous with the flash sometimes. Also ew, Terry Richardson.

      It's basically the same color I had before, but it had faded quite a bit and my roots were growing in blonde, which had a weird effect where it looked like my hair was thinning or I did a crap job brushing out my dry shampoo. It's super dark now, but it'll lighten up after a few washes. Not that I mind. I quite like having my hair very dark; I think it enhances my eyes (which is why I'm making the crazy-eyes face above. I think. Maybe that's just my face). Plus it's kind of fun to be really really pale with really really dark hair, like maybe I'm just in black and white, on my way to go hang with Steamboat Willie and Lucy Ricardo. 

4. I reconfigured my bookcase. Again. 

      You may recall that the last configuration I had going on there was a curtain-type cover held up by tension rods. Well, full disclosure: it didn't work out. Turns out I had underestimated my cat's innate instinct to annoy the absolute shit outta me. She got into the habit of pawing at the curtain at ungodly hours of the night and morning until she pushed the tension rods back, making a loud metallic shuffly sound that drove me absolutely batty. So I had to rethink the situation. I sat in the floor staring at the bookcase for a good half hour, plotting and scheming, while my mom's face floated around my head, cartoon style, saying "Why don't you just clear out the bottom shelf and let her have it?" I hadn't wanted to empty the shelf because there were approximately a million cords hanging back there that I didn't want her to chew on and die or start a house fire. And because it would look stupid to have the entire bottom shelf completely empty. So after some frenetic late night crafting, this is the solution I settled on. All the cords got organized (half of them weren't even connected to anything, so I rolled them up into a box in case I ever need them) and put into one of the shoeboxes on the middle shelf. There's only four cords going in there into a power strip (it looks like more, but some of what you see is cords connecting the dvd player and cable box to the tv, and the cable wire loops around like eight times back there, so it looks like more of a mess. Whatever, I'll deal). I'd read that you don't need to worry about cords getting too hot and posing a fire hazard unless they have that block adapter halfway through the cord, but just in case, I cut the back off the box so it stays ventilated and un-explode-y. 

     Once I had the cord situation under control, it was time to tackle that bottom shelf. I wanted to put Bessie's water and food dishes on it so that I wouldn't kick them as I walked by and make huge messes anymore, but I didn't want to risk a spill ruining the wood. So I grabbed an old Ikea shopping bag, which is essentially a tarp, and pulled it apart, cutting the resulting material to cover the shelf. But that's ugly! So then I raided my scrap fabric stash and found some navy and white polka dot fabric to put over that. To keep it in place I just wrapped it around the back, then pushed the bookcase against the wall to hold it, then wrapped it under the front and slid empty videogame and dvd cases under to hold the fabric taut. If this is all sounding very jury-rigged and mad-scientisty, it's because it was. I couldn't stand another night of waking up to that God-forsaken tension rod slipping. But it's worked so far, and it could look a lot worse. 

5. I don't really have a number five, but I like having five items in a list. 

     I did change some diapers yesterday, this time without having any catastrophic flooding events, so I was quite proud of that. But I don't think you'd appreciate a picture of that very much, so instead here's a picture of cute little baby feet in the grass.