Anxiety is a hell of a drug.

     Well not really. I just like to sound like a jaded 70s club queen sometimes. Keeps things interesting. So, anyway! I'm back from my adventure! I went gallivanting off to Louisiana to visit mon petit ami, which was a really big test for me to see how far I've come in dealing with my anxiety. As you'll know if you've been reading for a while, homegirl has problems. Problems interacting with people, or being haunted by slightly embarrassing mistakes for years longer than is strictly necessary, or worrying myself to the point of physical illness over all the things that could potentially go wrong in a given situation. So you can see where flying alone across five states and a time zone, with a layover in the middle, could be a bit of a challenge for me. But in the words of the great Meatloaf, I would do anything for love (but he wouldn't do that. He sucks. Ipso facto, I'm a better girlfriend than Meatloaf. Schwing!), so I put on my big girl pants (they're leggings) and did it anyway. And I was really pleasantly surprised by how non-anxious I was! Airports are designed for dum-dums in the first place, so navigating them wasn't difficult at all, and it wasn't even stressful to interact with the people working in them or on the planes, because in a place like an airport, you know the employees have all seen some shit. They are used to the stupidest, most belligerent people on earth; you'd have to do something incredibly, catastrophically, brain-meltingly stupid for them to even remember it. So it doesn't matter if the question you need answered really is stupid. 

     Aside from those sort of organizational, "be in place A at time B" aspects of traveling, it was completely stress-free. That's what makes me say "Anxiety is a hell of a drug." It's so amusing to me that my brain decides talking to the nice old dude at the ticket counter is cause for abject terror, while hurtling through the sky at 500 miles per hour in a tuna can with wings is a totally chill delight. It's like all the fear I was allotted in this life was assigned to people and the passage of time, and there was none left to go towards normal things like fear of, oh, I dunno, literally any situation that could lead to my death. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Brains are funny little things. 

     So yes! I can now officially boast having traveled alone without getting irreparably lost (keyword irreparably. I got lost driving once, but I figured it out, so it doesn't count) or having a panic attack. The only issue I ran into is the part during takeoff where it feels like your head is squashing down like a Barbie face under a shoe. I still don't love that. 

 Yes, like dees.

Beach Post #3!

     My beach week is coming to an end! It's always sad when a vacation ends, and it always goes by too quickly. But I'm looking forward to getting home and starting up some new projects. The getaway was a good way to get my creative juices flowing again -- I have lots of ideas! And it's good timing to leave today anyway, what with Andrea barreling directly towards where we stayed. Anyway, let's talk about what I did during my last two days in North Carolina. 

     Part of each of the last three days of my trip was spent raging at this one dude who showed up on the beach outside our house every day -- for THREE DAYS, remember -- to dig a giant hole in the sand (like, waist-deep) and then leave it there, unfilled, like a booby-trap for unsuspecting people/animals/children/beached whales. WHY? To what end? One theory was that he liked to let it fill with the incoming tide and warm up like a hobo hot-tub, but two of the three days the hole was so far inland the only way it was gonna fill up was with a sudden downpour or a truly stupid number of trips to the water and back with a bucket. Surely it's not just for fun, right? There's literally an entire movie about how digging holes is so unpleasant it can be used as punishment/reformation for degenerate pre-teens. I wouldn't even care if he'd just fill it in at the end of the day, but no. Just left it there each time for someone else to deal with, which is just rude. It's like pooping in the floor of a bank and assuming someone else will clean it up: yeah, some poor soul will probably do it eventually, but should they have to? No.

     When I wasn't busy raging against this obnoxious stranger, though, we did fun things. Like visit the dunes at Jockey's Ridge State Park. Some members of our party who shall remain nameless think dunes are super boring, but I thought it was cool. The best description comes from a review I read before we went, which simply said, "An impressive pile of sand. That is all." That's accurate. But I'm down to be impressed by large piles of sand, so that's cool with me. If you're expecting to get up there and like, go bowling or be served a three course meal or really DO anything other than look at stuff and go "cool, man," then yeah, you're gonna be disappointed. But looking at stuff and saying "cool, man" is a hobby of mine, so I enjoyed it. 

Welcome, this is my dune. I can't say "dune" in anything other than a deep, creepy, drawn-out way more suitable to the word "doom." Duuuuuune.

More duuuuunes. Click to embiggen. Yeah, that's a word I've decided I like, get used to it.

     We also went putt-putt golfing, which I love because it combines overtly cheesy decor and whacking at stuff with sticks. I came in third (out of six people), so I won't complain. I totally would have won first place if I hadn't been practically incapacitated by the sunburn I mentioned in my last update, which is still searingly painful...

Ugh, look how tan Amanda's legs are back there. Not even fair.

     Just kidding, I never would have won (serious about the "incapacitated by sunburn" part. I struggled mightily to put on pants yesterday). I'm not actually very good at putt-putt, but I like it anyway. 

     And I finally managed to get a better picture of the dolphins! 

I was dead-set on getting a picture that was better than the Bigfoot-quality one I had before.

     They were particularly excited -- jumping out of the water and slapping their tails on the water! It made me want a dolphin friend. Not to keep, just like, to pet at an aquarium or something. 

     And that's all, folks! I'll be back at home by the end of today, barring any catastrophic traffic or weather events (I'm lookin' at you, Andrea. You keep your stormy ass away from here til we're gone). 

     Regular posting will resume Monday!

Beach Post #2!

     I'm back with the second update on what I've been doing on vacation! Unfortunately this update is a bit more...crispy. But we'll get to that.

     Monday was stormy and rainy. I didn't mind because I like storms to begin with; a beach storm is twice as nice! We spent much of the day working on jigsaw puzzles and playing board games.

 
     And we saw dolphins! They like to swim along the shore here, but unfortunately the slippery little devils are really hard to catch in pictures. But I tried anyway!

     Once the rain slowed a bit we ventured out to do a bit of shopping. 

      Somewhat difficult, because the rain had flooded...um, everything. At times it felt more like a boat ride than a drive, but we made it nonetheless.

     I didn't buy anything, but I got to pet the world's fluffiest dog, so I'll call it a success. Later we found a nearby restaurant for dinner. I ordered a coconut breaded chicken sandwich, which came with a pineapple sauce that made it amaaaazing. 

     The next day was considerably brighter, so we decided to park ourselves on the beach for the day. We built this monster of a sandcastle. 

      All of my input was based almost entirely on Game of Thrones logic. I mean, obviously back there is the Keep, and the courtyard where the sand people practice their archery skills, and we need a good strong moat to keep the Lannisters at bay. 

     Unfortunately I sat in the sun screaming "NO, IT'S FINE, YOU STEPPED ON MY MOAT, I CAN JUST DIG IT AGAIN" for too long and got a painful sunburn. 

     Yep, that embarrassingly abrupt line is where the hem of my shorts falls. Luckily, since the breeze on the beach kept it a bit chilly, I had a zip-up hoodie on, so my top half didn't get burned at all. So at least that's something to be grateful for as I slather my entire lower half in aloe every ten minutes and walk around all stiffly like a recently reanimated skeleton, lest I accidentally move some skin and ignite the burning pain of the sun's core on my flesh.

     Anyway, despite feeling like I've got two steamed hot dogs instead of legs, I'm still having a good time. It takes more than sizzled skin to stop me!

Beach Post #1!

     In case you missed the memo: I'm at the beach! Lest you think I'd run off and forgotten you, I decided I would keep you updated about what I've been up to. So here's the rundown:

     We spent much of the day in the car on Friday. We left at 11:00AM and drove for four hours. Amanda drove, Sophie helped with the navigation. 

Sophie also helped us glare at all the jackwagons who cut us off. Not so effective, her glare is adorable.

 

     I helped with the obnoxiously surfing through every station every ten seconds to find a good song. 

     We arrived an hour early, since we couldn't get into our rental house until 4:00PM, so we quested for food and scoped out the area while we waited. Then finally we were in! After swarming through the house to check everything out, we unpacked and headed out to the beach to have a look. And have spent practically all our time since either relaxing by the waves, picking up seashells...

Our freshly-built walkway and beautiful ocean view.

The full scope of things.

    

Just after sunset.

....Or lounging in the solar-heated pool. It hits the most perfect temperature imaginable around 3:00PM, where I just want to float there forever in perfect homeostasis. And with all this frolicking in the sun, I've already managed to get a light tan! By my standards, anyway, which admittedly, is still a shade of pale considered cause for admittance to the hospital by some people's standards. But tan lines are present and I haven't burned! I'll call that a win!

Don't you want to go swimming now?

      
     The pups are handling it pretty well. Sophie still has zero interest in getting in the ocean water -- I don't blame her, it's furrreeeezing! Good thing we've got that pool! -- but she doesn't seem afraid of it either. Lexie, on the other hand, doesn't know what to make of this "ocean" beast. 

     But they both like to dig around in the sand, chase the crabs, sniff the air for all it's exciting sea-smells, and of course, tromp through sand castles like Godzilla destroying the city.

     It's so relaxing to have an ocean breeze and the sound of waves coming in through every window. In fact, I even have a momentous announcement to make: I slept really well Saturday night. Yeah, you read that right. Me, Insomnia Queen, out like a light for eight glorious hours. I had put Clue on Netflix to lull me to sleep and was asleep before Professor Plum even got there. I hope I can really shatter all my best records and sleep soundly for two, three, nights in a row...maybe even all week! Dare to dream, right? Literally?